“I don’t need this anymore. I have other ways to deal with the shit in my life.
We’ve all done the ‘I’m never drinking again” thing in the depths of a killer hangover.
But this time was different. This time led to now, 9 years of sobriety.
I didn’t tell myself I was giving up drinking. That would have led to feelings of loss, deprivation, suffering.
It would have led me to the wine aisle in a matter of days.
I told myself I was staying sober.
I enjoyed remembering going to bed, waking up with memories, and without shame.
I didn’t tell myself ‘forever’. Forever is terrifying. I told myself ‘today’.
I had no idea of long term sobriety. I couldn’t. I didn’t know who I was without alcohol.
But I knew I didn’t want to be who I was with it
One sober bedtime at a time, I became a sober person.
And after 6 weeks, I realised I liked her more. And wanted to be more her.
After a beautiful day at my brother’s wedding, I woke with crystal clear memories, and no fears of what I might have done. I was ready to embrace a life of sobriety.
It was with pride, not fear, that I told my family of my decision on the drive home.
I created a new habit by focusing on the positives, taking it one step at a time and becoming more of the person I wanted to be.
Who do you want to be?